my master ….he holds me down and looks into my eyes,
“when was the last time you said you lost track of time?” but he says this as he kisses my neck and I am still bound
“I never said.”
“The last time you heard of something —an act someone claimed you did ….”
He stops here
I hold my breath
I go within but —no I am caught….into his ….weird connection to me —his power
it pulls me. it…. is some invisible golden rope which ties my deepest self to him and with it —and with this; ignites some unknown primal sexual trigger within which —by now I should know how ….to fight
“It was a long time ago. I was at a party in New Jersey ….” how does he disarm me so that ….?
“Tell me,” he says
leaning over me and holding me down as he bites my neck,
“I will look after you….” like a vampire holding me on the edge, he bites sadidtically into my neck so that I am forced to whimper,”” he says,”tell me—I own you, duva.”
“I behaved badly at a party thrown by my Portuguese friend’s friend ….we studied together at the Academy of Dramatic Arts ….one night after on 42nd street …. Amtrak to New Jersey …. .she snd her friend got me drunk snd then apparently ….i transformed into this wild personality who was smoking cigarettes!!! And throwing back double scotches!!!! —cracking jokes—!!! and I said things I should not have ….but I don’t remember —to this day—any of it…. !!!!” I don’t even look at him; it still is a horror to think…. but why do I tell him? And with every word of my confession …. I feel …. that weird power like a vibe pounding into me …. his energy does …. things to me—his very scent even. Still I only say, “So…. That was the day I decided I wanted to find out about regressive therapy because …. before thst …there were …. things ….”
“Hush,” he says, “close your eyes ….That’s enough for now….”
and then yes …. I do forget because he turns me and ….i cannot say here
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