electric dawn

if I was not not frantic, I think I would be able to be. again. would be able to create. and laugh. and waste my time just playing 

but there is peace. within. more now than it was when there were my captors. a woman on her own has a great price to pay. camo stealth and move quick. 

right now—let’s stop.right now, perch….watch the horizon over this —cliff; perched upon.the precipice.i have more peace than before under the thumb of all my captors.i move fast.still.i have the spider reflex; still.spring.would i settle for a one less than me?no….i have my standards.they were not as endurable as me; could not understand ….could never…see…me—well, why; I know why.they required a lot of work….they were all projects.and left zero room to be me 

i take no prisoners, free agent unless you prove you are as endurable—had to fight for every little thing to claim as yours…. nothing just given to you…imposture syndrome? That was never charted on my character because I fought to be, to breathe and to say “I AM!” ….i have no sympathy for those with guilt trips of a life paved by entitlements ….its just yeah, im that tough; im an actual warrior so i dont need a cos outfit 

if i was not frantic i think I would think calmly.clearly.why am i frantic—that my existence makes anyone uncomfortable when how was there ever a choice to be?its a mind blowing thought to a philosophical martyr