08 March 2023

the Smörgås Noir scene continues

you know…. as the metallic taste fills my mouth with that dread as I think about it

every time he says that everything is fine, everything is quite boring and normal it is like a tragical comedy that smoke screen may not be meant to fool me actually

I look at Josef as he sits at the head of the table and it suddenly occurs to me that the way the light is at this time of day —it could be a Folkmoot flashback because it hits me with a smack…. 

but glance back at Jörn ….I see him staring at me as I glance his way and it is that look ….right before I catch him I can see it there and 

it catches me to the quick 

 those capers of his

I’m always uneasy when he travels especially on a mission and …. well, I think about so many times he —messaged that everything is normal; it is like a flare gun going off or—a red flag? every time he says that everything is normal not to worry —the sirens blow 


“Before I would agree to anything,” I look at Josef when I say this, “I want full disclosure ….” 

But now I look at Jörn. I say as I look up at him,

“I will not agree to anything until you tell me —everything….” 

and keep my eyes steady on him. I don’t look away. I hardly blink. And I find this time I need to know how far he would push his luck about me; how far

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