Electra’s dictionary/surprising message(jmmusechron)

 

Something for which I will never understand, is how I have witnessed an attitude from some —either in my past or those in passing ….as though they own a piece of you, or all of you because they open a door, say hello or insist upon some tiny generous act of such which was never asked for 

independence is like oxygen to me and I see now —this— has been what keeps me on this solitary path and ….really separates me from the stereotype of my gender ….so much so to the extent that I really do wish to be called some other gender ….yes, I would chat with you, I would enjoy the hours in discussion only though if it is understood we begin as equals ….until you prove yourself not up to par ; then I would grow bored I am sure

and I see now this is what feels most threatening to that mighty gender or those posing as such but thank god I am older now to look at the generation I’ve been among and can laugh at them all now for their lazy minds and sloth like energy to prove them able to keep up with the will and conversation which I enjoy to challenge 

oh how they bore me

I see an interesting email,

“Oh my god!” I say aloud, “someone is interested in my project!”

It is on the way back from headquarters, but now with it all catching up with me, feeling sick in the car —the tension sets off the spinal pain and causes the inflammation ….from the stress of day, all the switching gears of events which began in the psychiatrist’s office, then the ordeal of being shot at 

….and the other part I have not written about —what happened on the highway when Jörn got out

to chase them I’d thought but…. that’s not what happened. What happened was—the one chasing us got in through the backseat door ….and holding a weapon attempted to kidnap me which is exactly what Jörn was banking on….calculated risk so he says

I look up now from the email and glance at Jörn’s profile

“You’re still angry,” Jörn says now as he drives 

“Can we not talk about this anymore today?—my head is going to explode,” I put my head down between my legs feeling unwell but I say, noticing a shard of glass on the floor, “the windshield is fixed….”

I hear Jörn’s casual grunt,

“while you were giving the statement.”

“So I’m going back to Sunny’s—what’ll I tell him?”

“He’s been unaware you were gone,” Jörn says, “he had a health emergency while you were at Dr. Evens, he’ll return by tomorrow noon, likely….so….”

But I notice we are still en route towards the lodge yet,

“this is not the way….” I say as I realize

“No…. there is an adjacent property which ….” that pause I know

“Let me guess, Airbnb?”

And I hear that chuckle