He says to try to sleep....
I have tried a warm shower in the sterile ad hoc stainless steel stall (and as refreshingly cozy as a vertical cow trough)—with the soap from the trunk which afforded more luxury than the narrow shower unit did. It smells of Provence and almost makes me believe I am there with the film it leaves on my skin
At least clean and human again
Fixed as I am after looking for distractions in the various trunks on the floor. But they have lost their appeal and instead I stare at the blank canvas that is the hide’s wall of window; right now total black in the darkness
And because I feel like I am in a fishbowl with all the openness and the feeling of exposure, I sit on the floor with just one candle lit beside the cot where I have dragged the last trunk I inspect in order for distraction
How long before daybreak?
I keep looking at my phone for the time and in the end decide to use it, as I do, to write my thoughts
....then at turns.... pace the hide in circles
....then go to sit down again, huddled on the floor next to the cot and shiver; my hair still damp and my arms pulled out of the sweater sleeves inside the sweater and rock for warmth .... it seems forever I wait
At some time after two I hear the sound of footsteps treading the stairs and hold my breath watching the hobbit door, pulling my knees up to my chest under the big wool sweater
.... I don’t know who I expect but I am relieved to discover it is actually Jörn. His presence, a dark silhouette in the round doorway, but I can clearly recognize him by his distinct shoulders and slim hips that taper down to his boots
“Where are you?” he says from the doorway, closing the door and walking towards the candle
“I’m over here,” I say, waving my hand in front of the candle, “I feel like the light might draw their notice,” and I wave out towards the trees
“No, it’s completely made of black out material, no one can see in. I’ve tested it,” he says coming over to where I am
“So, did you guys work out a plan? Have the feds contacted you?”
He clears his throat and sits down on the cot,
“come here, don’t sit in the floor,” and reaches for me saying, “yes—to answer your question. It.... has taken some convincing but—once I sent them the link to the surveillance footage from the micro cameras I installed on the surface of the fake safe .... they have come around to listening to what I have to say....” he sighs with cautious relief as I move to stand up and now drawing me to him he says, “they will have the house surrounded by o-eight hundred—Smulagan and a SWAT team— they’re asking us to wait as some of their people are still en-route.... I just am uneasy about waiting, but.... the weather being what it is—it’s been sleeting and could go on all night, well into morning,” he shrugs
“Mountain weather,” I say with a shiver and move closer into his body warmth
“It’s not so different where I come from,” he says into the sweater and moves his hands under the wool and cotton
it has been a long time. It seems a shock to be aware just how long. I have forgotten what this feels like
but some things come back to you fairly quick. Once reminded
....I press my mouth against his
and let it come back to me
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