“Also, is the present concern about your sister ….” Jörn paces the width of the room wearing a posture of tension that —outside of myself, alerts me
He looks at me,
“you do realize this too, do you not?”
I quiet the rage
I turn my gaze to the first window nearest my scope to ….
nothing comes in …. do you …. ? Celf….
and watch the walls with inner vision as the bullet proof walls come down over the standing walls. Armored. Bolted. Nothing comes in
armored …..I feel nothing
I look at Jörn knowing he is about to let loose the arrows and wait for them to hit
because I can’t feel —I don’t feel ….not here—nothing goes out ….
I look at Jörn dead on,
“so have your genius master mind shark tank come up with why she is targeting me yet again? I’d love the intel ….”
I pretend I don’t care.
And maybe I don’t anymore —I mean….about anything ….how can I get hurt if I truly don’t care? It occurs to me that it’s possible that without knowing this, ha, I’m numb with the scar skin of war and endless battle. Tough. Tough skin. I don’t mean it—it just happened by itself ….
He shrugs,
“It’s not deep—she’s not exactly complex,” he chuckles and shoots me a casual glance with kryptonite but says, “as Willem puts it, ‘it’s the narcissist same old tune, how boring’ ….”
Jörn sighs and walks back to the window after pausing to study me (I’m laying across the bed and looking at him upside down)
I actually feel bored. Suffocated. And sick of it all
I sit up,
“is there some note I should pin to my calendar over this? Because I’d rather go back to ….Willem—“
“You don’t care that she is after something?”
“It won’t work, and no I am too wiped out on this incarnation’s life to care anymore about anything —so….how exactly is Willem involved in —you know…..”
Jörn crosses his arms over his chest,
he paces in deep contemplation as if weighing out conflicting thoughts,
“You met him—Elan….he was then involved in ….well; we knew him from Le Havre; he’d port there …. but he had a past neither of us then knew about….” Jörn comes to sit beside me and looks down into my eyes studying me. I am as if frozen now; stunned …. I wait holding my breath ….He brushes a long strand of hair aside that has fallen across my face and cups my face within his hand and stares …. “you have the same eyes—the same face and expressions ….he saw it first, actually….” Jörn stands up and walks back to the other side of the room, he goes to the other window and sighs, then as though now decisive, he suddenly says,
“ever hear of Redbad?”
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