on the stripped to cement floor of the penthouse living room and my old quilt as the magic carpet beneath us, as if this is so natural to sit here with him. so natural that I can stretch myself to reach my toes to him ….after years
no place now to even hide but the shadows of the room that keep us under the illusion of safety until I think— of the glare of the morning
he suddenly says
“I have discovered something about you I never knew,” he tells me now with that impossible lilt from his native land that dusts everything with magic
“What?” I ask and start to feel the color rise to my face
He reaches across the floor beside me where lies my mobil. He taps it,
“when you got up before ….you really should put a passcode on your phone tsk tsk .”
I reach for my phone but look at him, I just keep my hand there
“I’ll keep that in mind —while you’re here.”
But he is just watching me,
“I always had the feeling. But—now it’s confirmed—so—that website—you’re not as —vanilla as you liked to pretend in —the past?”
“Did I ever pretend that?” I ask but no, I’m already standing up and grabbing my phone and wondering
“You’re angry.”
He says that.
I think I’m meant to ask:
“what are you playing at?”
But, instead, I look at him and slowly so as to seem quite bored with the game, walk in the direction towards the kitchen
do I know the answer to that? and the reply that is in the no reply
He follows me
and as he does so I say, waving my hand in the direction of New York City,
“and while all that is at my feet….” and here I stop to peer out at the city street of the city that never sleeps, “it could be on the other side of the universe for all the good of its charms —when I can’t even afford a hot dog off the corner stand,” I say
But then I say,
“maybe I didn’t have the vocabulary to speak of more complex flavors like black sabbath raspberry ginger snaps so you only heard vanilla —but I don’t remember you complaining of me that time in the telephone booth, but I guess you forgot about that?”
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